Show up as her... Show up as the person that you want to be. That includes not only your vibe, attitude, personality, and how you treat people, but the way you look - your personal style - as well.
Do you have a closet full of clothes and feel like you never look quite the way you want? Nothing seems to be right and you just feel sort of blah about how you look daily or often? Getting dressed feels like a chore or is filled with negativity? When you're out and about, you wish you were dressed differently? That may be because you haven't really planned out and defined your personal style. Saying that makes it sound kind of serious and not fun, almost like homework, right? But... taking the time to define how you want to look and present yourself to the world, may make all of the difference in your confidence level and daily mood.
We don't need to worry about what other people think of us and the way we dress. That's insecurity as a result of fear of not being good enough. The only person you need to worry about presenting yourself to is you, and you alone. How you represent yourself and the way you look, has a spiraling effect due to your own confidence and mood that affects ourselves and everyone around us.
When you take the time to define your personal style, and invest in pieces that meet the "definition" of how you want to look, you will open your closet and feel joy when you see your wardrobe and put yourself together each day. There's no set way you need to look or dress. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. All that matters is that you like what you wear and you feel good in it, whether you are the most dressed up person or the least dressed up person. Own your style. Own your confidence.
Many people impulse buy. When they're out shopping, they impulsively buy things that seem cute or they like at the time, or are on sale, and when you get home, you have no idea what to wear that piece with and how to work it into your wardrobe. Or you wear it once and realize that you weren't that crazy about it after all, and it's too late to return or exchange it. We've all been there.
Here's some steps you can take to avoid these issues and cultivate a wardrobe that you love and feel excited about.
1) Spend some quiet time thinking about how you want to look and ask yourself these questions -
- what am I wearing when I feel my best and most confident
- is there someone who's style I admire and want to emulate or dress similarly to
- what do I feel most comfortable wearing
- when I go to ______ (fill in any place), how do i want to look and what do I want to be wearing
2) Go to a store where you can spend some time and try many things on. You don't need to buy anything. Just go to a big department store or Target, where you feel left alone and that there's no salesperson hovering over you and you can take the time to really analyze the pieces. Unless you try a bunch of stuff on, you won't be able to find pieces that look and feel their best. You can't go to a store and try on a few things, get frustrated that nothing looks good and give up. It takes much practice, like anything else, to find the right styles for your body type and desired look. Eventually, you'll figure out which cuts and styles you feel best in, and you'll be able to spend less time trying things on, because you will just know what works. This process also makes it much easier to successfully buy well-fitting items online.
3) Edit your closet. Get rid/donate/sell any pieces that you:
- Don't feel good in
- That are damaged or too worn. You will never fix them. Just get rid of them...
- That don't meet your sense of style as defined above. You can ask yourself some questions like, "Would I wear this to _____ ", "Would _________ (who's style I admire) wear this?"
4) Once you've spent some time on these steps, be intentional. If you are about to impulse buy a bright green sweater, but have realized that you don't feel your best when you wear green and would prefer to dress in neutrals - don't buy it! You won't wear it. You have to train yourself to remember your vision of how you want to look, and to not buy things that don't fit into that vision you have of yourself. This will help save money and reduce excess, both in your closet and in fashion as a whole.
5) Start to create lists (mental or tangible) of items that you want to incorporate into your wardrobe that meet your personal vision. Maybe you want to add in a black turtleneck sweater, or have been searching for a long sleeve white dress. Whatever it is, make note of the pieces that you want that create your ideal wardrobe. Having ongoing lists of what you want to add in to your closet, will help avoid impulse buying. You'll have something specific to look for when you're shopping, and just know that those pieces will eventually show up as you continue to build and develop your style.
It's important to remember that there are no rules to style. You don't have to completely define and pigeon-hole your style into one thing and never deviate from that with a rigid set of questions or rules. The most important thing is to wear what you like and feel good in, and buy pieces that reflect that feeling.
Defining your style is more about having intentionality with your look. If you don't feel good when you wear a hooded sweatshirt and feel like a hot mess when you go out in them, and you have 20 hooded sweatshirts... be intentional about what you're choosing to keep and what you're choosing to part with.
Defining and developing your personal style doesn't have to be expensive. There are so many options and price ranges in the world of fashion to choose from. If you can't afford much, then start with discount stores and build from there. If investing in expensive pieces is important to you, then you'll build slowly.
The most important thing you can do today is start to develop the vision of how you want to look, feel and show up. The rest of the pieces, pun intended, will fall into place.
If you need further help in developing your style, closet editing, personal shopping, makeovers, reach out --- there's a ton of styling service options available through Amber Moon, and we're happy to help! Also, here's a style questionnaire we have on the site as a tool to help personal styling clients streamline their look with intentionality - Feel free to take it here!
When we look good, we feel good --- changing the world one sweater or jumpsuit at a time. x Stacy, Owner of Amber Moon Boutique and Amber Moon Beauty
Listen to me chat more on the topic of "Defining your Personal Style" on the Amber Moon Podcast: Episode 6: Fashion: Defining and Developing Your Personal Style